if i can run in heels then i can drive
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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