Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Randomize
