chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
We found him in the backyard throwing shoes onto the roof yelling "WHO BRINGS CROCS TO A HOUSE PARTY?!"
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Randomize
