God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
Randomize