he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize