so explain again why im purple
no
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Randomize
