i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
Look I'm really high right now, and if I were to leave this house, it would be for the sole purpose of getting an ice cream sandwich. So can you please just do it.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
