What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
He told me he wanted to sleep but I touched his penis and listened to his heart beat start racing. I knew sleeping was bullshit.
Use your nursing skills for good, not evil.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
And then he peed in my hair
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