Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
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