Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
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