Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I wish they had a "No Yankees" filter on status updates.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
I feel I should send an apology letter to my anesthesiologist.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
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