tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
No subtext here. People are naked.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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