you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
guy at the bar just asked how many cows we have on our land, then proceeds to ask me out. you know your from the country when....
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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