He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
