They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
LOOK AT MY ASS AND LEGS IN THIS SKIRT. I KNOW ALL THE BEST HIDING SPOTS IN THIS BUILDING. AND I OFFER TEQUILA.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
