Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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