sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Im forcing mysellf to pee so i can fit more margaritas in me...
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Randomize
