Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
God I need to hump something, right now.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize