my throat hurts so bad i feel like i just gave head to a cactus.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
