So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
Randomize
