the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
