those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I was gonna respond but i couldnt figure out a way to rearrange 'fuck his brains out' to sound grammatically correct
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
