Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I need to stop drinking alone, I wrote a love letter to my tattoos
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I woke up with a chicken in my yard
Do you not remember hopping the fence into a chicken coop and screaming "choot em'"like you were on swamp people?
No recollection, can you come help me shut this thing up
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