Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
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