You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Randomize