You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
