East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize