At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
Randomize
