well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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