i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i have some very unhappy turtles in my backseat
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
