**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
Whatcha textin bout Willis?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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