with your own penis?
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
Randomize
