Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
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