My liver just broke up with me...
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize