And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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