Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I will pee on everything he values.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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