they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Randomize
