dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I look excited, but its just a facade.
My vagina is very pro this idea
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
