Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
Dude, I think my check liver light just came on
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
