never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Randomize
