One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
Randomize
