Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I enjoy the company of your penis
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
