She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
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