If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
