Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
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