the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
