Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
