I am puke
Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
