Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Randomize
