In Vegas, have spent the last 48 hours wearing a viking helmet and fanny pack. I consider this to be a career high since drinking is my career
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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