its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
