That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I just invented spray cheese vodka. tastes real nasty but does the trick.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
